


Confession of a Guilty Man

by partsguy



Series: Reunion [2]
Category: Endeavour (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:40:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24261475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/partsguy/pseuds/partsguy
Summary: After years of being apart Joan and Morse are trying to rekindle their relationship.
Relationships: Endeavour Morse/Joan Thursday
Series: Reunion [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1729336
Kudos: 1





	Confession of a Guilty Man

Confession of a Guilty Man  
I parked the Jag in the area where the PC had directed me, switched everything off, and took a deep breath before getting out. From the number of people milling around it wasn’t hard to determine where I needed to go. As I approached the group, I noticed Sergeant Lewis talking to what I assumed to be one of the members of the SOCO team.

“What have we got Lewis?”

“Evening sir” He didn’t bother with any more idle chitchat; it was far too early in the morning and we had performed this particular task hundreds of times before. He pulled out his notebook and began to give me the details of what he had found out so far. A male mid-forties, stabbed. Max had already arrived and was making his examination prior to the removal of the body.

“Has there been an identification yet?”

“According to his drivers license he is one Otto Williams, forty-seven years of age, an excursion bus driver. He worked for this company, lived here in the city.”

About that time Max DeBrym walked up, having finished his examination.

“Gentlemen”

“Max, what have we got” 

“stabbed in the chest with what was apparently a very sharp instrument, death wasn’t instantaneous, but he didn’t linger long”.

“time of death?”

“not more than two hours ago”

“anything more that you can tell us at this point?”

“nothing now, after the post mortem, …..say around one?”

“umm”

“Gentlemen” with that the pathologist took his leave.

“Awright, Lewis any witnesses?”

“none so far, sir, the body was found by the gentleman who cleans the buses. Seems like he had been somewhere off the premises at the time, although he’s not being very forthcoming about where he was. The owner of the company has been called and is on his way. Uniforms will be doing a house to house at the end of the block, perhaps there was a dog walker or something. 

Awright Lewis, cordon off the area, once it gets light have the premises, all the other vehicles etc. searched.

Sir, the owner isn’t going to be very happy about that surely, he has excursions booked, may cost him a pile.

“Leewis”

“yes sir.

I lay there in the darkness propped on one elbow listening to the rhythmic breathing of the woman lying beside me. The sound of the antique clock the only sound to distract me from her. Even though the room was in darkness I could make out her form silhouetted against the backdrop of light which filtered in through the curtains. Occasionally she would move, a slight stretch or a subtle shifting of her body. Her breathing, which could hardly be called snoring was a bit deeper than I remembered it. 

I had always enjoyed watching Joan sleep, it was always a time of contentment to me. She almost always fell asleep after we had made love, while I rarely did. As much as I enjoyed watching her, that wasn’t what was on my mind now as I waited for her to waken. I felt a need to bare my soul to her. Not merely to tell her that I loved her, it wouldn’t be the first time I had told her that. I had been in love with her for almost the entire time that I had known her. And I’m sure that I wouldn’t be the only man to tell her that as she lay in his bed. So it would probably sound trite or cheap at a moment like this. Yet I desperately needed to tell her, to confess if you will, how very sorry I was. Sorry for what I had done all those years before. And how much I regretted never having tried to make it right. In short for pushing her away on the eve of our wedding. But was now the time?

It was then that I noticed a change in her breathing which told me she was waking up. Again she stretched, lay still for a moment, I could tell she was collecting herself before turning to me. 

I could sense rather than see a smile on her face in the darkness. “Hello”.

“Hello there”

She reached out her arm wrapped it round me and pulled me close before saying “that was nice.”

“its been a long time”

“speaking of time, what time is it?”

“I don’t know, let me see” I pushed the button to illuminate the dial on my wristwatch before sinking back onto the sheets “its gone half past eleven”.

“you shouldn’t have let me sleep so long.”

“I enjoyed watching you sleep, you know that.”…..”Besides I was gathering my nerve.”

She huffed a small laugh “you, gather your nerve? That sounds serious, I’m not sure I want to hear”

“There’s something I want to talk to you about……No, something I need to say to you.” “Something I should have told you a long, long time ago”

“Morse, I want to hear it, I truly do, but I need to get home, can we talk on the way? Debbie will be worried”

The Jag purred through the streets of the city, chewing up the miles towards her house. 

“I wish I didn’t have to take you home tonight.” That didn’t get a response, as we both knew that she had to go.

“What was it that you wanted to tell me, I’m sorry if I spoiled the moment.”

“I don’t know if I should now, maybe it’s not important”..

“Come on Morse, if it was important then it’s important now.”

“No, it can keep”

“That’s it, Morse, pull over.”

“you’re serious? … I thought you had to get home.”

“Yes, I’m serious, pull over”

I found a spot where I could pull the Jag into a deserted parking area.

“Morse, if it was important enough for you to be thinking about after we made love, its important enough to tell me.”

“I don’t know if I can, or should, exactly.”

She sat silently waiting for me to begin.

“I know I hurt you terribly back then, and I knew it the moment I did it.” …….”Oh, I could use the excuse that it was the alcohol, or the stress, any number of excuses, but that’s all they are…. Just excuses.” 

She didn’t say a word, didn’t utter a sound, waiting for me to continue.

“but I think the really unforgivable part is to never, up until now say I’m sorry.”……..””and I am sorry”……”I won’t ask you to forgive me”. 

We sat there in silence for what seemed like minutes but probably wasn’t.

“Morse, I can forgive you, and judging from the events of this evening I already have….at some level”. 

“But, Morse…..forgiveness and forgetting are two entirely different things. I will never forget”

I opened my mouth to continue, but before I could she put a finger to my lips to stop me. “come on, take me home”

We made the rest of the trip in silence. Each thinking about what the other had said I suppose.

The Jag came to a stop in front of her house, but before I could get out she laid a hand on my sleeve to stop me.

“Give me a minute……I’ve been talking to Graham’s friend Susan about some things…….You remember Graham from the reception?”

“Yessss.”

“They’ve been friends for years now and have a very loving relationship. He’s asked her to marry him several times, wants her to give up her work and says that perhaps it’s not too late for them to start a family.”

“Sounds like an attractive offer”

“It’s not to her Morse, she has no desire to rattle around in his house and be a breed mare.”

Now it was my turn to be silent.

“I think I know what you are feeling, that things could have been different for us, but they aren’t Morse, and I understand how she feels, I love my children Morse, but I’m not sure that the life he is offering her would appeal to me either…..at least not right now.”

The silence inside the Jag was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

“Was there anything else you wanted to say?”

“eh, no I don’t think so.”

“Well I’d better be going in.” she huffed that little magical laugh of hers “I guess this is where I say I had a lovely time.” And opened the door.

“I can tell you what the real crime is Lewis”

“what’s that sir?”

“It’s right here in this cup!.......Gawd, this coffee’s awful….Lewis why didn’t you warn me of how bad it is?”

“how many year’s now have you been drinking it sir?”

“Seems like it’s getting worse”

The sergeant just smiled to himself, time his boss got in one of these moods it was the same thing. He suspected it wasn’t the coffee that was really troubling him this morning. He suspected that it was something that, in years gone by, might be referred to as woman trouble. If so, he was only too happy to see it. He couldn’t imagine a life without his wife, Morse’s bachelorhood was something that he just couldn’t understand.

As much as I wanted the caffeine I couldn’t take anymore. I sat the cup back on the desk before going back to business.

“alright what have we got so far?”

The ever-conscientious Lewis flipped to the appropriate page in his notebook before beginning. “Dr. DeBrym believes the time of death to have been somewhere between 1 and 3 AM. Cause of death to have been a single stab wound to the heart, by a small sharp blade. Most likely an inexpensive common knife such as a switchblade as opposed to a stiletto. There are scrapes on the knuckles of the right hand as if he were in a fight at the time of or shortly before he died.

“Has the cleaner told us where he disappeared to?”

“Not yet, but I will be talking to him again.”

“Were any other drivers supposed to be there at the time?”

“No, he was taking a special early charter out. No other drivers due to arrive before six.”

“bring the cleaner in and I want to be there when you talk to him”

“Ready?”

“what? Joan looked up from the paperwork on her desk toward her friend Linda standing in the doorway of her office.

“Ready to take a break?”

“Oh, it’s that time already.” She automatically looked at the clock on the wall before answering “Yes, sure, just give me a minute.” She straightened the papers on her desk, before standing and joining her friend as they walked toward the break room.

“How’s it going this morning?” 

“Oh, alright, same old story, too much need not enough volunteers”

Her friend paused to look around the sparsely appointed break room to make sure that nobody was there to listen in. “you know that’s not what I’m really interested in.”

Joan raised an eyebrow, knowing what the next question would be.

“come on, how was your date last night?”

She took a few seconds to finish preparing her tea, “oh, ok I guess.”

“that’s not exactly a ringing endorsement.”

“it’s true, it was nice”

“ok, if you don’t want to talk about it”

“well it’s the truth” knowing her friend wasn’t going to be put off she felt she had to say more “we’ve known each other a long time.” “a lot of ups and downs along the way”

Linda snickered at that response. “I thought so!” that drew a quick retort” oh, get your mind out of the gutter”

Linda couldn’t help but laugh at her friend’s defensiveness. Then. “so when are you going out with him again?”

“who said I was?”

“you didn’t have to, you haven’t acted today like a woman who had a disastrous date last night.”

“who knows, he may not ask me again”

“uh, huh, you expect me to believe that.”

“Well he is a very busy man you know”

Linda leaned back in her chair and smiled at her friend, “I didn’t ask you whether you were going to marry him.”

Joan stood up, not wanting to continue the discussion, even with her friend, “that’s not about to happen, I think its time I got back to work, see you later” 

Linda watched, a thoughtful look on her face as her friend put her trash away and walked out the door. Certainly Joan had left a lot unsaid and that spoke volumes. She had no doubt that an old spark was being rekindled despite what she was being told. A sly smile spread across her face as she wondered whether Joan had found “her old friend Morse” to be good in bed last night. Then she stood and followed her out into the hallway and back to work.

It had taken several days, but we had finally made significant progress. Lewis of course had done the bulk of the routine work, interviewing drivers and so on. The cleaner had seen the deceased come in for his excursion, had even spoken to him. Then knowing that no other drivers were due until six he had left the premises to visit a girlfriend. When he returned, he had found the body outside the office of the company, his bus idling in the parking lot.

According to other drivers Mister Williams was not universally liked by his fellow employees. Some of the other drivers felt like he had received preferential treatment from the company. Of course that was denied by the company, the owner being adamant that he insisted on equal treatment for everyone.

“Awright Lewis, what about these claims of favoritism?”

“I’ve interviewed all of the other drivers and it seems like a small group, about four of them believe that Mr. Williams was getting preferential treatment. More work than they were getting.”

“How is that?”

” These drivers all work a specific area in and around the city. They claim that the work isn’t done on a rotating basis. That instead Mister Williams worked every day while they ofttimes sat at home.”

“Is that the company’s policy?”

“I spoke to the owner and he was rather vague, just saying the dispatcher, who makes the work assignments, was doing what he wanted.”

“Hm, perhaps I need to chat with him……..why don’t you check the companies records and see if there is any truth to this. If some people were not making money while Mister Williams was……” 

“Thank you”

The waiter smiled a vacuous smile at the woman before placing the other drink, a rather large one, in front of the gentleman at the table. Straightening he glanced, first at the gentleman, before asking, “will there be anything else?” 

The gentleman just shook his head slightly in dismissal, at which point the waiter gave the slightest of bows and stepped back one pace before turning and leaving them.

“your health my dear” he said to her before taking a satisfying sip of his drink. She smiled a thank you before doing likewise.

“So how have you been doing?” The children doing well I trust, I imagine this has been a difficult time for them.” 

“They are actually coping better than I expected.”………..She gave a slight grimace before adding, “not that there haven’t been moments, particularly with Fred.”…..”Sometimes I think he’s trying me, just to see what I will allow.”

“That’s not unexpected is it.”

“No, I suppose not. He probably misses his father more than my daughter does.”

“Umm. Speaking of males” 

She sat her glass down for the moment, knowing what was coming.

“Morse behaving himself?”

She laughed. “He has too, you’re keeping him busy enough……that wouldn’t be by design now would it?”

“idle hands are the devil’s workshop they say”

She had to give a laugh at that. “seriously, he’s been very good.”

They noticed that the waiter was on his way back towards their table., so before he got there, she felt compelled to add “I’m a big girl now Jim.”

he studied her over his glass before responding. “quite so, but leopards seldom change their spots. Don’t let him mess you about”

“are you ready to order?”

“I believe we are.”

As it turned out the claims were accurate, rather than rotating the work among the four drivers the dispatcher was giving Williams work every day. The other drivers only worked if there was additional work available. A review of their pay showed a dramatic difference between themselves and Williams. But the breakthrough came when we talked to the head of the group that Williams was supposed to take on an excursion the day of his death.

They had asked for another driver by name to take them on the trip and had been assured that their request would be granted. Then under questioning the dispatcher, after originally denying it had admitted that he had assigned the requested driver the job. But had changed it on the afternoon before the trip. It appeared that Williams had been kicking back money to the dispatcher in exchange for preferential treatment.

Then we found that the driver originally assigned had returned home that morning suffering from bruising, telling his wife that he had been mugged on the way to work.

In the end it was found that two drivers had shown up for work that morning, Williams being the first to arrive. Neither expected to see the other, and neither was willing to give up what could have been a lucrative job. Words had been exchanged, punches were thrown, with Williams getting the upper hand over the older smaller man. In what he felt was self-defense, the other driver had pulled out a small knife and stabbed Williams in the chest. Realizing that the bus cleaner was not on the premises and that there were no witnesses he fled.

As Lewis and I were interviewing him for the last time, he admitted what had happened but claimed self-defense. We arrested him, and he was incarcerated awaiting trial.

“I don’t see why you are so stubborn……..you know you need to do it.”

What I needed to do now was to move my arm just a little bit, the way Joan was positioned was making it a little uncomfortable. “I just never have liked going to the doctor.”

“that’s just being foolish, you know you need to.”

“awright, will it make you happy if I do? Will you stop banging on about it?”

” yes.”

“ok, I’ll do it, just leave me alone about it, Ok? “

She raised her head up so she could look me in the eyes “when?”

“soon awright. Now let me hold you a little longer before you go.”


End file.
